I went to the Pyramids on Tuesday, and my attitude took a turn for the worse. The tourism & antiquities council has been very proactive about cutting back on hassle at the pyramids, but has created some other ghastly issues:

1) There’s a hideous concrete wall, topped with chain-link and wire, around most of the plateau. Looking down from the plateau, you see the neighboring village backed right against it–an unfortunate architectural echo of the wall in the Palestinian Territories. I wonder if anyone in the 8,000 tour buses that trundle up there every day even notices.

2) And the whole plateau is now geared only to tour buses–the paved roads are wide enough only for one of these wheezing, lumbering air-conditioners on wheels, so if you’re on foot, you have to trudge through the sand, batting away people with made-in-China alabaster pyramids, cheap dishdashas and the perennial camels as you go. The difficulty of walking then makes you look like even more of a grump for not taking up anyone on their offers of camel and horse rides.

3) Now that the number of vendors and camel drivers on the plateau is controlled (I actually saw one of the tourism police guys giving chase to some interlopers–they on horseback, he on a camel), the line of conflict for the high-pressure horse-and-camel-ride sales has just moved farther out from the Pyramids. So you’re sitting in traffic at a light, and some guy comes up and tells you the road is closed ahead, and it’s better to take a horse…which he conveniently has. Fortunately, I know how to say “Liar, liar, pants on fire!” in Arabic.

4) The tourism police guy I talked to essentially admitted they have no control over the situation. “Yes, the official price for a horse or camel ride is EL35 per hour,” he said. “But of course you’re still expected to haggle.”

Anyway…the Pyramids. They’re still there. You kind of have to go, because they’re a wonder of the world. I had to go, because it’s my job. But with all the heat, buses and horse hassles, it’s a little hard to have fun.

I wonder–has anyone gone to the Pyramids and come away saying, “What a great day!” instead of, “Oh sweet Jesus, I just want to get into bed with a cold compress and a gin-and-tonic!”?

Please let me know… It will make me feel like I’m doing this for a reason.