Category: Why Astoria Is the Greatest Place on Earth

Astoria Breaking News: Philoxenia, new patisserie

You heard it here first (maybe–I’m too lazy to check other blogs):

1) Philoxenia, the brief but beloved place on 23rd Ave, appears to be reopening on 34th Avenue, in the space that, geez, four years ago was a great Peruvian bar, Gustavo’s, and hasn’t been anything since. Philoxenia was a little Greek place that was super-home-style and felt like eating in someone’s living room. And, it turned out, you kind of were–apparently the space was not at all zoned for resto use. I hope they make it in the new space–it’s surprisingly large, with a big bar up front, and quite a lot of seating in the back.

2) New patisserie, called La Brioche d’Or, about to open on Steinway right next to the Little Morocco sandwich joint, immediately north of the little T-intersection with 24th Avenue. You know in my fantasy this is just the guys from Le Petit Prince reopening under a new name. Damn, that would be sweet. But it would also rock if there was a Franco-Maghrebi pastry joint in the neighborhood.

Which reminds me–it’s Ramadan. So don’t go to Steinway during daylight hours and expect service with a smile, or even service at all. Just wait till the sun sets, and then the party gets started. (Ramadan will be done in the second week of October.)

And, totally unrelated, my alpine strawberry plants had four little fruits on them! They taste just like fake strawberry flavor, just like I remember when I went berry-picking in Norway. So delicious, in a confusing, maybe-I-shouldn’t-really-like-this way.

Why I Love Astoria, entry #2,873: El Athens Grill

Athens GrillI’m sure it’s just for legal reasons, but it warms my heart that this Mexican joint on 30th Avenue still has the word ‘Athens’ in its name. It’s been a Mexican place for a couple of years, but it came out of the closet this spring with signs in the window advertising tortas, tacos and more, and switching the open window-service zone to a display of salsas and tasty-looking spiced meats.

Inside, there’s still the bad mirror-mural of the Greek countryside, and even a poster on fluorescent paper saying, “Bienvenidos a Athens Grill!”

The torta rocks, and they have Mexican Coca-Cola. Welcome to the neighborhood, mis amigos.

Astoria Made Safe from Oglers

Man, everything is happening at Ditmars now that I’ve left!

The NY Times reports that there was some dude standing around under the stairs up to the train, looking up the ladies’ skirts.

Well, our noble council rep, Peter Vallone, was shocked, shocked to learn that there was no law against this kind of thing, so he got right on the ball and made one.

I would thank him for this, except he’s the same guy who claimed he didn’t know about the Steinway sheesha (aka hookah) joints two weeks before the smoking ban was put to the vote, and so, golly, hadn’t formulated any plan for how they’d be dealt with under the new law.

Dude, that’s your turf! Aren’t you obliged to know what a major business district in your zone is up to? And represent them?

Anyway. The sheesha places seem to be doing fine, no thanks to Vallone. And now someone can be hauled off to jail for seeing my underwear. Astoria breathes easier.

A Pox on Pistilli

It’s probably punishment for my bitchy rant about the Eagle building on 21st Street, but I just discovered that the 10-story building going up on Newtown Avenue, one block from my house, and permanently blocking my view is a project of Pistilli Realty Group.

Unless Joseph Pistilli got knocked upside the head by the Angel of Aesthetic Values in the last year, the place is guaranteed to look like unmitigated ass.

I know, I admit–it makes no sense to complain about ugly in the Borough of Ugly. I too go to Brooklyn and breathe more easily, stand taller, without the glare of vinyl siding and metal awnings refracting off my retinas. But I still prefer Queens (and I kinda like the awnings). I just don’t want it to get any uglier.

Even Queens can become a super-saturated solution of ugly, if developers aren’t careful. One more granite-faced bank building, and the whole place could crystallize! With ten stories of hatefulness, plus two of underground parking (like people need to be encouraged to drive their cars to a place that’s one super-short block from the subway stop! Assholes!), this Pistilli building will generate a deadly chemical reaction of abomination, with the fallout raining down for blocks around.

My only satisfaction comes from reading a February 2007 article in which Joe P. claims the place will be ready for occupancy this fall. The bulldozers are currently wallowing in muck at the bottom of a very, very deep hole. Heh.

Monkey-wrenching, anyone?

Ali’s Kabab Cafe: Now Starring on No Reservations

Can I just say?

Anthony Bourdain, while eating Ali’s food: “I’m insanely jealous of people who live in this neighborhood now.”

Hell, yes!

Now watch the clip:

The funny thing is, I was _there_ for the taping. In the other half of the restaurant that you don’t see on TV. It was not as thrilling as it sounds, to be 10 feet from Anthony Bourdain et al., but the food kicked some incredible ass. (Despite–or perhaps because of–the fact that Ali was drinking his “special” espressos from the cafe across the street, meaning with a slug of sambuca.) If you’re looking very, very, very, very closely, you can see the edge of my glasses in the background while they’re smoking sheesha afterward.

However, if you go here and get to photo No. 9 of 11, you’ll get to see my actual boobs, all decked out in baby blue! Granted, I’m hunching over a little, so they’re not at their best. And you unfortunately can’t quite read my culturally appropriate “New York”-in-Arabic T-shirt from Rana Hajjar. But it’s me. And Tamara. And Nina, another KC loyalist.

But, really, it’s all about Ali, and he looks fantastic. Independent sources confirm this. We have a houseguest arriving in a couple of days from Savannah, Ga., and he said, “Oh, there are two places I want to go in New York! I just saw them on TV! One’s this place called Kabab? In this neighborhood called Astoria? And the other is Prune.” (Sorry–no one’s posted the Prune section online yet.)

Welcome to my world! I know how to cook potatoes rosti the Prune way, and Tony Bourdain is jealous of me!

Queens Bloggers on Brian Lehrer

So Peter and I left the blessed borough for about 26 hours earlier this week, and we both missed chances to be on the Brian Lehrer Show, completely independent of each other, just because we weren’t checking our email.

I was asked to be on a show that just aired this morning, about Queens bloggers, a club of which I am at least 20 percent of the time a member. megc, of Joey in Astoria and OuterB, represented our ‘hood, fortunately. Here’s a spiffy little link to the clip:

(And if that’s not working, go here).

Through that, I found my way to Queens Central–a nice-looking blog that proves that you can make a blogging career out of one post linked back to Curbed.

Of course I clicked right on the “Astoria” category. Only to find a post giving credit to the beer hall for making Astoria what it is today. Oy. No. What makes Astoria what it is is all the people who _aren’t_ at the beer hall, all the Greeks, Egyptians, Croatians, etc. who keep moving here. I am happily subject to their whims (even if, I guess, they can’t keep a French patisserie open, damn it). Anyway, cranky comment to this effect alongside the original post over there.

I guess it’s better I wasn’t on the radio or I might’ve started a fight.